Dealing With Death: The Grief Process
Everyone understands when we grieve the loss of a friend or family member. But when you lose your beloved pet, some people aren't as understanding. After all, it's just an animal, right?
What those people don't understand is that our companion animals can be more important and close to us than even a family member or best friend, and the death of an animal can be just as devastating as losing a member of the family.
The first thing to remember when dealing with the loss of a pet is that you have the right to
.. Here are the typical steps you might find yourself going through:
· Denial - Thinking, "This can't be happening," or "This isn't real" is your brain's way of gradually coming to terms with the loss.
· Bargaining - Trying to make a deal with a higher power, or even your pet itself, to make her come back.
· Anger - Asking "Why me?" or feeling anger toward yourself, the vet, or even your pet for leaving you.
· Guilt - Wondering if you did enough to prevent the loss, asking yourself if you could have done more to save her, or protect her, or keep her from harm.
· Authentic sadness - Allowing yourself to truly feel the loss and realizing your pet will not return.
· Acceptance - Accepting the reality of the loss, and experiencing decreasing sadness over time.
What Can You Do to Grieve?
You can help yourself along in the grieving process by allowing yourself time to be alone, finding a friend who will listen without judging, or participate in a support group that focuses on the loss of a pet. Express your feelings about your pet by writing in a journal, creating a scrapbook, or compiling a montage of video footage.
Avoid the impulse to go out and get another pet right away to replace your longtime companion. No animal will ever be able to replace the friend you've just lost, and your hopes and expectations would be unfair to yourself and to the new dog. Another dog might be a wonderful idea eventually, but make sure you've given yourself time to get all the way through the grief of your loss; make the decision because you want to give love to another completely individual animal, rather than trying to replace the one who will never be forgotten.
